Response to "The Grind"

Cole, I liked this story.  I've always wondered about the employment process for big time talk shows in New York.  The story seems to surround the main character, Skipper Fischer and his journey through the application process for a famous talk show called "Midnight Slot with Stewart Donahue."  The character seems to be almost indifferent to his skill of writing; he's simply got a knack for it.  Towards the end of this process he starts to realize how shallow the actual writing is for the show and the business of late night talk shows in general.  The potential employees for the company, and even Donahue himself, come off as greedy, lacking in talent, and venomous towards celebrities and their audience.  Repulsed by what he is hearing, Skipper tosses his notebook and leaves the room.

I liked the idea for the story in general.  It's an interesting subject that I don't hear about a lot.  I think you did a good job staying inside the main character's head.  I felt like that was very important with the story since Skipper separates himself from everyone else involved in the story.  He even disassociates himself with Ryan, the "errand boy."  However, Skipper and Ryan aren't that different.  If anything, Ryan is more connected than Skipper since he is employed.  I also liked the end, how Donahue takes Skipper's notebook.  It shows how desperate and greedy that business can be.

I do think some things needed work.  It didn't make sense to me that Skipper was such a purist, but so indifferent to his passion.  If Skipper was more passionate about pure comedy and the skill required to produce it, his reactions to the dull, money-based attitudes of the company would make more sense.  I would work on deepening the character of Skipper.  That was the biggest thing to me.  Other than that, I would probably focus on polishing up some dialogue.  The voice of Martin didn't stay very consistent with me.  During the interview, he seemed to talk like an older guy.  That made sense.  However, the encounter in the hall between Martin and Skipper seemed awkward.

"Oh, hey man," [Martin] said.  "You must be looking for the Writing Room, right?"

That greeting sounded like it came from someone much younger.  Maybe that's something you wanted to get across.  I would just work on small stuff like that.

Other than that, I thought you did a near-perfect job.