Response to "The Last bit of Homemade Sugar"

Nate, I really liked this story.  The main character seems to be the narrator.  I don't think you mentioned the name.  The obvious conflict in the story starts towards the end, when a friend of the family, Jonesy, has a heart attack.  Chaos ensues as the grandfather and the father race Jonesy to the hospital.  Once the truck drives away after being stuck, the narrator's thoughts move towards the afterlife.  The theme of this story seems to be a lot about family and good values, but then quickly shifts to themes of morality and how tragedy can crash into good moments. 

I liked closeness of the family and community.  This story almost seemed like creative nonfiction which I really like.  The relationship between the grandfather and the narrator seemed very natural and real.  Grandfathers definitely like to give out gum and say things like, "Hey buddy, what do ya say?"  I liked that. 

I would like to see more family interactions.  Most of the story is the narrator describing the history and what the family likes to do together.  I would like to understand more about the relationship between the father and the son, the uncle, and even the family friends.  I didn't know who they were until the phone call about the heart attack happened.  If you added more about the relationships, it would intensify the conflict.  Also, it was hard for me to really see what the main character wanted.  The story seemed to be mostly just the background and history of his family.  I liked that, but that was three- fourths of the whole story.  The conflict of the heart attack was great, but only lasted about a page.  I feel like you could do a lot with that.  Even before the heart attack, the narrator seems to just be wandering without thinking of any desire.  That seemed a bit unreal to me, because no matter how good things are going in life, there is always something in the back of my mind, whether it's a problem or a desire.  I feel like if you paid more attention to that, it could really improve the story.