Great story, Nate. This is a story about a guy who gets sentenced to community service for, from what I can tell, being drunk. He doesn't reveal his name, but the guy he works with, John, calls him "college boy." After his confrontation with a sort of manly female police officer, college boy goes to Florida to do his community Florida instead of going to New York for an internship he had his heart set on. College boy describes in good detail what his job entails and his daily routine basically. One day, while digging, he discovers a wooden chest with a not attached to it. The note is in German. John guesses that it is treasure and sure enough there is gold in it. After daydreaming about their plans, John reveals that it's just lead with gold paint.
I think this is a cool idea. It seems like you know a lot about the type of work that college boy is forced to do. I liked how you were able to go into detail about that stuff. It was really believable and added to the story. I liked the relationship you created between John and the narrator. I know some guys that remind me of John and you did a great job bringing out that content, older character.
I do think there are some things that are missing from this story, however. I think the story lacks the conflict that it needs, and I'm not really sure what the character wants, either. I feel like once you figure out the wants of the character, the conflict will be easy to come up with. I think you could do something with the relationship between John and the narrator to cause conflict. Maybe John could be a drunk, abusive, etc. Maybe instead of there being a treasure chest, have some other type of incident that happens with John that is really crazy. I feel like that would create a lot of change in the narrator. Also, I don't really see where lemon drops play into the story. Maybe you can work with that symbolism a little more.
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